ADHD in children

Maddie Barrett
Nov 12
6 min read

Updated: 2 minutes ago

This article takes a deep dive into ADHD: what it is, what it means, and how you can best support a child diagnosed with ADHD.

What does ADHD stand for?

ADHD stands for Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. It is a neurodevelopmental disorder, which refers to a group of disorders that begin in childhood and affect the development and function of the brain. Other disorders include Autism Spectrum Disorder, Dyslexia, and other learning difficulties.

ADHD is categorised into three main types:

Inattentive ADHD: This type refers to difficulty staying concentrated and organised.
Hyperactive-Impulsive ADHD: This type is characterised by never seeming to slow down, talking and fidgeting, and difficulties staying on task.
Combined ADHD: This type refers to when an individual experiences symptoms of both inattentive and hyperactive-impulsive ADHD.

While symptoms can overlap, the dominant traits determine the specific ADHD type, influencing how individuals function in their daily lives. This will also influence which treatment option will work best.

ADHD in children

It’s totally normal for kids, especially younger ones, to be busy, distracted, and full of energy from time to time, especially when they’re feeling anxious or excited. The key difference with ADHD is that these symptoms stick around for a longer time and can affect how a child functions at school and at home.

Currently, boys are about three times more likely than girls to be diagnosed with ADHD. This might be because girls often show fewer of the “disruptive” signs associated with ADHD. It does not mean that girls don't experience ADHD, but rather that it looks different in girls and boys. More research in this area will help with better diagnostic systems to ensure that girls and young women are not being overlooked.

It is not about laziness or poor parenting, but about the brain functioning differently in areas linked to attention, impulse control, and activity levels. These differences can bring challenges in structured environments (like classrooms), but also come with unique strengths such as creativity, energy, problem-solving, and the ability to think outside the box.

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What does it look like?

Children experience different symptoms from adults, and ADHD usually looks different in boys and girls. Keep this in mind and remember, this is not an exhaustive list!

At school, ADHD may look like:

Tuning out or appearing to daydream, especially when being given instructions
Talking a lot, interrupting others and being unable to wait for their turn
Having trouble with homework, and often giving the impression that they have not heard the teacher's instructions
Having trouble starting a task on their own or completing one without regular one-on-one support
Staying hyper-focused on certain tasks or activities
Frequently calling out in class or a group and being known as the ‘class clown’
Doing dangerous and impulsive things, like jumping from heights or running out onto the road without looking out for traffic
Acts quickly and is often willing to take risks or try new things
High energy levels that can be channelled into sports, play, and learning
Acting before they think
Being easily upset
Getting angry and “exploding” quite easily
Finding it hard to make and keep friends due to not understanding social cues

(list taken from: https://mentalhealth.org.nz/conditions/condition/adhd-in-children)

Some may face negative comments from teachers or family about their behaviour or school performance, which can leave them feeling “not good enough.” Supporting children with ADHD in building their self-esteem is super important. Adults can make a big difference by recognising and celebrating their unique talents, skills, and efforts.

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When to Seek Support

It may be helpful to talk with a GP, teacher, or health professional if their behaviours:

Occur across different settings (home, school, social situations), and
Significantly impact everyday life, such as learning, friendships, or relationships.

If you think that your child might have ADHD, the first step is for them to be assessed by a specialist. You can ask your GP for a referral to a specialist under the public health system, which will be free of charge but may mean waiting some time for an appointment, or you can contact a private specialist directly, which will incur a cost but may mean you can get an assessment sooner.

Pathways for Support

Support may include:

Education and strategies to help manage attention, energy, and emotions.
Whānau support to build consistency and celebrate strengths.
Medication for some children/young people, to support focus and regulation.
Mental health support such as therapy, to help them build strategies to support challenging thoughts, feelings and situations

The "best option"

The “best” treatment for ADHD is one that serves the needs of your child. It’s a good idea to discuss your concerns and experiences with an experienced healthcare professional. They’ll be able to explain how effective and safe each approach is, what you should know, and as well as the expected outcome.

Medication: One option for managing and thriving with ADHD is with medication. It's best to talk with your doctor about this as a treatment option.

Therapy: There are talk-based therapies which look at the child or young person's thinking, behaviour, relationships and environment.

For ADHD, these treatments include behaviour management and social skills training to help support your child at home and at school. It’s important that children are encouraged to develop and learn coping behaviours and skills, and parents and teachers play a key role to help them learn and practise these new skills.
Family counselling can also play an important part in helping everyone in the family understand the condition and support the child. At Skylight, we offer counselling for neurodivergent children and whānau.

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Ways to support a child with ADHD at home

For whānau of children with ADHD, the following strategies can be useful:

Everyday routines in the home. Children respond to predictability and structure. Routines help the child to know what the rules are around getting up, showering, mealtimes, homework, going to bed and playing. If a child has to navigate this themselves, it increases the demands placed on them, which can be overwhelming for someone with ADHD. Setting up a clear and predictable structure can help by creating one routine, rather than several tasks to remember. One option could be to use a reminder list or picture chart of the set routine.
Give instructions clearly and one at a time, so your child knows exactly what’s expected. One way to do this is to look your child in the eye when you ask them to do something and check they have heard and understood the request by asking them to repeat what you've said. For example: instructions such as "please put these toys in your room" (a specific request) will work better than "tidy your room" (a broad, unstructured, and confusing request).
Teach and encourage your child to practice using a pause before acting. The act of stopping and breathing first will help your child to pause and think things through before acting. Consider what will work best for your child in teaching and practising this. For example, if your child likes cars, they could practise holding a small toy car in their pocket, slowly feeling the sides and wheels of it as they pause and breathe.
Encourage your child to talk about their day – the good things and the not so good. You may be able to help them with a problem, and it’s important to keep the communication going. Build trust with your child by remaining calm and empathetic when discussing challenges. Problem-solve together and model useful conversations and strategies to use. On topics your child has more experience and confidence in, gradually step back so they can learn to problem-solve more independently, with support from you.
Build on your child's strengths. Find something your child does well, is interested in or enjoys doing. It is so important for them to experience success. This may mean the whole whānau takes up rollerblading! Physical activities that can be done in short bursts may work out better than organised sports for the child with ADHD.
Be positive about any success, even if they don't complete a task. It is better for a child's self-esteem if you say that you noticed how hard they tried to do something, rather than to comment on how they didn't do it properly or finish it.
Help them relate. If your child raises one of their challenges with you, assure them that everyone has things they find easier and harder (You can point to examples of this in yourself to normalise and model acceptance of this). Ask them if they would like more support in those areas, and problem-solve together how you can help them learn more in this area.
Take care of yourself and other relationships. At times, a child with ADHD demands more time and attention, and siblings can feel left out. You can only do your best to try and make sure that their needs are met (and be sure to use all the help you can get from extended family/whānau and community for babysitting, time-out, or having fun). Consider your own well-being, and create a self-care plan that supports your mental health. Remember, you are doing an AMAZING job!