Search Results

Loss and grief Browse our articles below. To explore our full collection of resources on other themes, click here . Loss of a Pet For many people a pet is a beloved member of the family and when they die it is a significant loss. Read more How to talk to children about death What is the right thing to say, especially at a time when a parent is often going through their own grief? Read more Bereavement When someone close to you dies Read more Loss of health One of the biggest challenges of any illness or disability is coping with the changes, losses, and grief that they can bring with them. Read more Ageing As people age, they commonly face many changes and losses. Grieving for these, and adjusting to new circumstances, can be hard. Read more Moving house? Helping your kids and teens through it. Deciding to move house begins a string of chain reactions within any family. Every situation is different and every child and teen is different, but some do struggle with the changes. Read more Delayed grief The natural grief process helps us adjust to loss. Delayed grief means the grief process hasn’t started or is stuck. This can be for a variety of reasons. Read more Loss of job Losing your job, for any reason, can be as stressful as losing a loved one. Here you can find different ideas to get you through this challenging time. Read more Explore all resources

Loss of a Pet For many people a pet is a beloved member of the family and when they die it is a significant loss. Loss of a pet — Skylight Trust For many people a pet is a beloved member of the family and when they die it is a significant loss. They could be a cat, dog, bunny, fish, or guinea pig – but we love our pets. They enrich our lives, are close companions, and in some cases, they have been with us our whole life. Whether it was from old age, illness or an accident, our pets will die eventually. When this moment comes, it is natural and expected to feel grief and sadness . In some cases, this grief can be like what we would feel if a close friend passes. When we lose a pet, our feelings can be very complicated. We may feel sadness, but we may feel other things too, such as anger, guilt, fear or one of the other responses to loss. Reactions are going to be different for each person in the family, but this loss can be particularly distressing for children - as they are likely, to have grown with their pet - or when the pet had a companionship role for someone in the family, (when they live with a mature couple after their children have moved, or when a person lives only with their pet). We may also experience sadness and anger if people don't seem to understand our loss, or they say things like, "But it's only a pet, why don't you get a new one?". We may feel guilt, like you could have done something differently, or you could have spent more time with your pet. Whatever you are feeling, it's OK to grieve the loss of your pet. Some ideas for helping you and your family to cope with the loss of your beloved pet are: Holding a ceremony such as a funeral or memorial service, can help create some closure, as it is a marker of the passing of a life of a beloved member of the family. Children can participate by decorating the burial box and you can put things inside that your pet liked or things that were important for them (like their blanket or favourite toy) Write a letter or a poem to your pet (children can make a drawing), telling them what they meant in your life. You could either read it at the memorial service or put it in the burial box for them If you are making arrangements for your pet's passing (because of their old age or a terminal illness), you can have the family present, so they can say goodbye. You can plan for them to have the best last day, full of love and treats and surrounded by family, before they pass Take some time-off as a family, to share stories and memories of your pet. This could also happen at the memorial and afterwards you could also light a candle or sing or pray Invite your children to create a memory book or board, with photos and drawings to keep as part of the family photo albums In the burial place, you could either plant a tree, a plant with beautiful flowers or put a special mark or rock, so you can remember where it is and where you and your children can visit, if you wish If you wish you could share your pet's history and photo on a pet's internet memorial website In some areas, there will be pet cemeteries and pet cremation facilities. Your local veterinary staff and funeral directors may have ideas for burial sites. How to support your children after their pet has passed? It is expected that your child may be upset with the loss of their pet, the grieving process is going to be different in each case. Some ideas for you to support them are: Explain in an age-appropriate way what happened or has to happen (in the cases when you know your pet will pass). In some cases, an experience like this will be their first experience with death, so telling them it is OK to cry or to feel sad would be helpful, as they may not understand what they are feeling Respect their timing. If you are making arrangements for your pet to pass away, you child may not want to participate or be present. Encourage them to write them a letter or make a drawing that you can offer to share or leave with the pet (if it's private) or ask them how they would wish to say goodbye, if they want to Pay attention to the days after. Children may seem quieter or withdrawn for a while. Invite them to spend time with you, so you could talk about what they are feeling, ask them what they would like to do that would make them feel better, and if possible and appropriate, do it. If at any point you have concerns about your child or someone in your family, please seek support from a mental health practitioner. You could also explore the other topics in the section for more information and ideas or contact the Resource Centre to request a support information pack. Useful links: Pet Loss Support - Pet Loss Help Coping with the loss of a pet | American Veterinary Medical Association The Stages of Grief - Dealing with Grief - Pet Grief Recovery Pet Farewells | Compassionate | pet cremation Pet Cremation NZ // Pet & Equine Burials >> Animal Cremation You might also be interested in: Bereavement Delayed grief

Explore Skylight's free articles, webinars & videos on grief, trauma, resilience & change — support for tamariki, rangatahi & whānau navigating tough times Loss and grief Trauma Relationships Mental health Neurodiversity Family change Suicide prevention Resources Articles, webinars, and videos designed to support individuals, families, and communities navigating grief, trauma, and significant life changes. To request a support pack, please complete this form . Articles Explore all articles Loss of a Pet For many people a pet is a beloved member of the family and when they die it is a significant loss. Read more Trauma Trauma is a response to either a one-time event or to many adverse experiences over time. Read more Autism Spectrum Disorder (Takiwātanga) Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a difference in how the brain develops and functions. Read more How to talk to children about death What is the right thing to say, especially at a time when a parent is often going through their own grief? Read more Webinars Explore all webinars Practical Strategies for Self-Care and Resilience This is the third and final instalment of Skylight's webinar partnership with the Child Cancer Foundation. Watch now Parenting through Grief This resource was developed for parents who are supporting their child living with cancer, or who have lost a child to cancer. Watch now Grief 101 for Parents A basic understanding of grief and how to cope when you are grieving. Watch now The Power of Journaling Participants will be taken on a journey of positive thinking, problem solving, mindfulness and self-care. Watch now Videos Explore all videos Trevney shares his story This webisode features Trevney sharing his story of how he has survived suicide or lost a friend or whānau member to suicide – it is for rangatahi by rangatahi. The personal experiences shared in the following video may be disturbing for some viewers as he talks about suicide. Watch now Journeys Through Methamphetamine Addiction Skylight Trust with funding from The Vodafone Foundation, has produced a web series that portrays the personal stories of four individuals through their addiction to Methamphetamine. They tell of how their addiction affected them, their tamariki, rangatahi and whānau. Watch now Matty - Resilience Web Series Here’s Matty in our resilience web series. Matty explains how surrounding himself with friends and family made him a happier person. Finding people with similar goals as you allows you to work together and push each other. Matty makes the connection between physical wellbeing and resiliency. Watch now Mana - Resilience Web Series Introducing Mana who explains that having a good support system helps you to grow and get through tough times. To be resilient, Mana thinks you have to be self-aware and real with yourself and others. Watch now

Skylight is here to help you through difficult times. We can assist you in a variety of ways with information appropriate for your situation. Articles Choose a topic and browse the full range of articles available Loss of a Pet For many people a pet is a beloved member of the family and when they die it is a significant loss. Read more Trauma Trauma is a response to either a one-time event or to many adverse experiences over time. Read more Autism Spectrum Disorder (Takiwātanga) Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a difference in how the brain develops and functions. Read more How to talk to children about death What is the right thing to say, especially at a time when a parent is often going through their own grief? Read more Anxiety Anxiety is a natural part of how our body prepares for challenges, but when it becomes overwhelming or constant, it can impact daily life and wellbeing. Read more If you are feeling suicidal Are you finding yourself thinking about suicide? Read more Family break-up When a break up happens in the family, it can be hard on everyone, especially when there are children involved. Read more Suicide and rainbow communities Aotearoa has the highest rate of youth suicide in the developed world, with rates for LGBTQI+ people, even higher. Read more Abusive relationships Partner abuse is a sign of an unhealthy relationship. Read more Bereavement When someone close to you dies Read more How to build resilience Ways to build resilience in children, teens and adults, and in families, groups, schools, businesses, organisations and communities. Read more Parenting Parenting is one of the most rewarding, challenging, joyous and frustrating experiences that we can have. Read more Loss of health One of the biggest challenges of any illness or disability is coping with the changes, losses, and grief that they can bring with them. Read more Ageing As people age, they commonly face many changes and losses. Grieving for these, and adjusting to new circumstances, can be hard. Read more Moving house? Helping your kids and teens through it. Deciding to move house begins a string of chain reactions within any family. Every situation is different and every child and teen is different, but some do struggle with the changes. Read more Delayed grief The natural grief process helps us adjust to loss. Delayed grief means the grief process hasn’t started or is stuck. This can be for a variety of reasons. Read more Loss of job Losing your job, for any reason, can be as stressful as losing a loved one. Here you can find different ideas to get you through this challenging time. Read more Select a topic Select Topic Select Subtopic

Trauma Browse our articles below. To explore our full collection of resources on other themes, click here . Trauma Trauma is a response to either a one-time event or to many adverse experiences over time. Read more Explore all resources

Trauma Trauma is a response to either a one-time event or to many adverse experiences over time. Trauma — Skylight Trust Trauma is a response to either a one-time event – such as an earthquake – or to many adverse experiences over time – such as Domestic Violence. After a distressful event, each person involved, will have a different reaction . For some of us, those reactions may be unpredictable emotions, flashbacks of the event, physical symptoms like anxiety, digestive problems, sweating, nausea, dizziness, and an affect on your eating and sleeping patterns etc. What your reaction will be, is dependent on personal factors, but it is important to remember that: traumatic reactions can happen to all of us. It is difficult to manage your reactions to unexpected events, that are out of your control. after a traumatic event, many people can have long-lasting problems, including Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) the symptoms you are experiencing after a traumatic event are the expected responses of your body and mind, trying to adjust. You are not going crazy, but you may need support if the responses are persistent or interfering with your daily life many psychologically well-adjusted and physically healthy people develop PTSD. Remember you are not the only one feeling this way, many people will respond the same to a distressful event by understanding trauma symptoms better, a person can become less fearful of them and better able to manage them, asking for support if they need. You might also be interested in: Anxiety Abusive relationships How to build resilience

Autism Spectrum Disorder (Takiwātanga) Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a difference in how the brain develops and functions. Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a difference in how the brain develops and functions. In te ao Māori, it is often described as takiwātanga , meaning “in his or her own time and space,” reflecting that it is an integral part of a person’s identity, shaping how they think, learn, and experience the world. Autism is not a disease, illness, or something to be “cured”, rather, it is a form of neurodiversity that contributes to unique strengths as well as challenges. While ASD varies from person-to-person, some common areas of difference compared to non-autistic people include challenges with: Communication: understanding, using, and interpreting language and social cues Social interaction: making friends, fitting in, and navigating relationships Thinking and processing: approaching problems, interests, and learning Sensory experiences: heightened or reduced sensitivity to sound, light, textures, tastes, or movement Movement and play: engaging in physical activities and hobbies differently Autistic people often have strong interests in particular topics, may repeat certain actions (such as hand-flapping or pacing), and usually prefer predictable routines. Sudden changes, new environments, or sensory overload can be especially difficult. The amount of support needed varies greatly. Some autistic individuals may need minimal assistance in daily life, while others require ongoing help with learning, communication, and everyday activities. Caregivers play an important role in providing understanding, structure, and encouragement so that autistic people can thrive and use their strengths. Useful links: Autism (for Kids) | Nemours KidsHealth Home - Autism NZ ASD / Home - SPECIAL EDUCATION ONLINE Altogether Autism - Trusted Autism Information and Advice Supporting your child if they need extra help with their learning - Ministry of Education About Autism Booklet - Parent to Parent Listening to Families You might also be interested in: Anxiety Parenting

Neurodiversity Browse our articles below. To explore our full collection of resources on other themes, click here . Autism Spectrum Disorder (Takiwātanga) Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a difference in how the brain develops and functions. Read more Explore all resources

Skylight is a national not-for-profit trust that enables children, young people, their families/ whānau and friends to navigate through times of trauma Programmes We offer resilience-building programmes for both schools and individuals, supporting mental health, emotional wellbeing, and personal growth through guided, age-appropriate experiences. Choose below to find a programme that fits your needs. Filter by Programme Type For individuals For schools Travellers Travellers is a school-based resilience programme designed for Year 9 students navigating challenging life transitions. Learn more Tai-oranga A four hour school based programme comprised of 3 modules - for tamariki 7 - 9 years. Learn more Matika An eight week programme to support tamariki through loss and grief. Learn more Pathfinders A wellbeing programme for young women and non-binary individuals aged 12 - 16. Learn more Heart Song A bereaved parents' support group in Wellington. Learn more Awhi Mai Awhi Atu Wellbeing Counselling support in schools. Learn more Parenting Through Separation PTS is a free information course for individual parents who have separated or who are contemplating separation. Learn more Waves Waves is an eight week programme that aims to support adults aged 18 and older who have been bereaved by suicide. Learn more

Parenting Through Separation PTS is a free information course for individual parents who have separated or who are contemplating separation. This practical information course is designed to help separated parents — or those thinking about separating — to understand and manage the impact of separation on their children. The focus is on what matters most: helping you put your children’s needs first. We are contracted by the Ministry of Justice to run PTS. Your personal details are entered into their secure database. A certificate of attendance is issued out of the Ministry on completion of the course. What the Course Offers A safe, supportive small group setting Guidance on co-parenting effectively with your ex-partner or co-carer Tools to create a workable parenting plan Insights into the Family Justice System and how to navigate it Practical resources and take-home materials A chance to connect with others in similar situations The course is run by experienced facilitators and provides a confidential space to share, learn, and feel supported — whether you are early in the separation journey or have been navigating it for a while. Course Locations Courses are held in Kāpiti, Lower Hutt, Porirua and Wellington CBD. If you are in a different region, check the Ministry of Justice website for providers near you. Family Works also delivers PTS in the Wellington region. Visit their website ( www.familyworkscentral.org.nz ) for their course dates and enrolment details or email [email protected] How to Enrol To register for an upcoming course, email [email protected] with your contact details. Upcoming course dates Please note - they may be subject to minor change. All sessions are 10am - 2.30pm . August 2025 Kāpiti - Saturday 30th September 2025 Lower Hutt - Saturday 6th Wellington - Saturday 20th Porirua - Friday 19th Kāpiti - Saturday 27th October 2025 Porirua - Friday 3rd Lower Hutt - Saturday 4th Wellington - Saturday 18th Kāpiti - Saturday 18th November 2025 Lower Hutt - Saturday 8th Porirua - Friday 21st Wellington - Saturday 22nd Kāpiti - Saturday 29th December 2025 Porirua - Friday 5th Kāpiti - Saturday 6th Wellington - Saturday 6th Lower Hutt - Saturday 6th You might also be interested in: Heart Song

Martin Weekes Trustee About me "My name is Martin. I'm married to Jane and a father of 9 children aged from 29-years-old down to my youngest who is 7. I am an accomplished leader, board advisor, coach and mentor specialising in transformation and change. I have over 25 years’ management experience as a senior executive working in Europe, New Zealand, Asia, Australia and the Middle East, working alongside multiple cultures and diverse work forces in the commercial, not for profit and governmental sector. Alongside my commercial career I have been involved with the not-for-profit sector working with and on the boards of several charities. This involvement has supported at-risk children, families impacted by domestic abuse, emergency rescue, children’s air ambulance, The Neonatal Trust, education, and sport helping raise over $100 million within New Zealand. I believe every child deserves the opportunity to live a full and happy life in a positive, stimulating, safe environment and it should be every parent’s wish to see that dream come to fruition. Sadly, that isn’t always the case. However, with the advances in society today that dream should become a reality for all New Zealanders regardless of financial or technological constraints and with innovative thinking, determination and personal commitment together we can make a huge positive impact for New Zealand families." Next Previous

We offer counselling for adults, children, young people, and family/whānau who are experiencing any kind of grief, loss and trauma. Kaimahi Our team brings together experience in mental health, education, and community care. We're committed to supporting whānau through life’s toughest challenges. Kathryn Ross CEO After more than 30 years in local and central government in a variety of roles. I joined Skylight because of its mission and values. Read more Amanda Gregan Director of Operations | Rangatohu Mahi Rangapū My role is to ensure the business runs smoothly and sustainably, while seeking growth opportunities across both existing and new areas of operation. Read more Jenny Devine Clinical Advisor | Kaiwhirinaki Haumanu I am a registered educational psychologist and the Clinical Advisor for Skylight Trust. Read more Vonnie Marshall Counselling Team Leader | Kaitaki Kapa Whakamāherehere I was born in Whanganui-a-Tara and lived in Nelson, where we raised three children. Read more Di Duncan Finance Officer | Kaitari Pūtea I am from the UK but relocated to New Zealand a few years ago. Read more Benjamin Jensen Senior Counselling Coordinator | Kaituitui Whakamāherehere Matua In my role at Skylight, I am a counselling coordinator/counsellor. My roles have changed over the last four years. Read more Bridy Haughey Senior Programme Coordinator | Kaituitui Hōtaka Matua I am an educational psychologist working as Senior Programmes Coordinator. Read more Emma Harbour Programmes Coordinator | Kaituitui Hōtaka Previously, a travel tour coordinator, flight attendant, foster carer and supervisor at a home for pregnant teens. I have joined Skylight this year as a Programme Coordinator. Read more Elliot Freeman Programme Coordinator | Kaituitui Hōtaka Matua I am the programme coordinator for Travellers, Skylight's wellbeing programme which supports young people to build resilience and navigate life’s ups and downs. Read more Tina Taylor Counselling Coordinator | Kaituitui Whakamāherehere I am a Counselling Coordinator at Skylight. Kia ora koutou! I am a Counselling Coordinator at Skylight. Read more Maggie Horrell Creative Arts Therapist Maggie Horrell (she/her/ia) a Creative Arts Therapist (MACAT) hailing from the south. She has a background in English and Classical Literature and spent seven years as a Seed Analyst which means her obscure knowledge is top notch. Read more Anne Bristol Office Manager | Kaiwhakahaere Tari I came to Skylight as a volunteer. This led to becoming the Board Secretary and organising Professional Development workshops across the country. Read more Azrul Bibi Administrator -Kaiwhakataka Originally from the Fiji Islands I arrived in New Zealand in 2023. I completed a Diploma in Accounting at the University of The South Pacific. Read more Maddie Barrett Social Media Coordinator | Kaituitui Pae Pāpori Along with being the social media coordinator, I am also involved in delivering programmes aimed to help tamariki and rangitahi increase their resilience and connect with their identity. Read more Dr. Nicole M. Coupe Chair Dr. Coupe is an experienced researcher and academic with a deep commitment to improving health outcomes through innovative practices. Read more Lesley Hoskin Trustee Lesley brings a wealth of experience to the Board. She is Chief Executive at the Teaching Council of Aotearoa New Zealand Read more Nikki Franklin Trustee Nikki has a strong understanding and connections with governance, built up over more than 10 years as part of the Executive Leadership Team of the Institute of Directors (IoD). Read more Brendon Oakley Trustee Brendon is a senior officer within the New Zealand Defence Force. He has seen and done much during his career, from undertaking management and support positions at Defence Headquarters in Wellington to serving with United Nations peacekeeping forces in the Middle East. Read more Tania Vincent Trustee With a career that spans high-level advisory and executive roles in both international and domestic environments, Tania understands the complexities of navigating public, private, and non-profit sectors. Read more Maria Mitimeti-Clark Trustee Maria is a leader with extensive public service experience – both at the Board level and as an Executive. A passionate advocate for better outcomes for Pasifika, Maria connected deeply with the kaupapa of Skylight. Read more Katharine Te Hau Bowden Non-voting Trustee Katharine is a Principal Advisor at Kāinga Ora – Homes and Communities and a former Private Secretary for Housing. Read more Akasha Te Amo Liana Rio Non-voting Trustee I am passionate about Te Tiriti o Waitangi, how we address mental health using a Te Triti-based model, and the journey Skylight is on to become a Te Tiriti-based organisation. Read more Dr. Amanda Perry Trustee Dr. Amanda Perry is an experienced clinician and academic leader, who is passionate about supporting people to reach their potential. Read more Martin Weekes Trustee I believe every child deserves the opportunity to live a full and happy life in a positive, stimulating, safe environment and it should be every parent’s wish to see that dream come to fruition. Read more